Overcoming Overwhelm: Finding Joy In Chaos
- èsjé
- Feb 24
- 4 min read
Updated: Mar 31
Feeling overwhelmed lately? Trust me, you’re not alone. It feels like the whole world is going through something right now. I often find myself longing for a time when responsibilities were fewer, decisions were simpler, bills weren’t so expensive, and the cost of living wasn’t so high. A time when misunderstandings were rare, and the people around us felt kinder.
Sounds like a simple wish, right? But in an overwhelmed state, everything feels amplified, and you start wondering—how on earth did I get here? Well, jewels, let’s dive into it in the post.
What is Overwhelm?
Overwhelm is a state of emotional, mental, or physical overload. It happens when life's demands exceed your ability to cope, leaving you feeling anxious, drained, or stuck. It can be triggered by excessive responsibilities, unresolved emotions, or external pressures, often leading to stress, burnout, and a sense of helplessness.
How to Manage Overwhelm and Regain Control
Pause and Breathe
When you feel overwhelmed, take a moment to pause. One of my go-to methods is deep breathing exercises. There are many different techniques, but I find box breathing especially helpful—it works wonders during a panic attack.
Here are two simple breathing exercises that can help to calm your nervous system, regulate stress, and bring clarity to your thoughts. They can both be done while sitting or standing with a straight back and eyes closed:
Box Breathing
Breathe in slowly to a count of four
Hold your breath for a count of four
Breathe out slowly through your mouth, counting to four
Hold your breath for a count of four
Repeat
4-7-8 Breathing Technique
Inhale deeply for four seconds
Hold your breath for seven seconds
Exhale slowly for eight seconds
Repeat
Identify the Source
When everything feels overwhelming, putting your thoughts on paper (or in an app) can be a game-changer. Seeing your worries laid out helps you prioritise, gain perspective, and focus on what’s actually within your control.
Journalling is a powerful stress reliever—it feels good to unload your thoughts onto paper. But if traditional journalling isn’t your thing, try alternatives like:
Notes apps for quick reflections
Voice memos for talking things out
Whiteboards & digital tools (like MeisterTask & Reminders) to organise tasks
Decluttering your mind can help identify the root of the overwhelm.
Prioritise and Break It Down
Not everything requires immediate attention. Use the Eisenhower Matrix to categorise tasks:
Urgent & Important – Do it now.
Important but Not Urgent – Schedule it.
Urgent but Not Important – Delegate it.
Neither Urgent nor Important – Eliminate it.
Set Healthy Boundaries
One of the biggest contributors to overwhelm is overcommitting. Many of us were raised to put everyone else's needs before our own, leaving us depleted when it’s time to care for ourselves. It’s okay to say NO to requests that drain your energy. Protect your time and emotional well-being by setting clear boundaries.
Ask for Help
You don’t have to do it all alone. Reach out to trusted friends, family, or colleagues for support. An outside perspective can sometimes reveal solutions you hadn’t considered. However, be mindful—before sharing, ask if they have the emotional bandwidth to listen. Also, clarify whether you need advice or just a space to vent. We don’t want to transfer our overwhelm onto others who may also be struggling.
Engage in Self-Care
Self-care isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. Whether it’s taking a walk, listening to music, meditating, or journalling, prioritising activities that recharge you is essential. Even small moments of rest can make a big difference. Personally, I love solo museum visits, coffee dates, spa days, and even travelling.
Shift Your Perspective
Remind yourself that overwhelm is temporary. If you, like me, grew up believing that everything you do must meet a certain standard, you may have unknowingly bred perfectionism. This mindset can make it hard to appreciate small victories, leaving you feeling like nothing is ever enough.
But progress—no matter how small—is still progress. Break big tasks into manageable steps and celebrate each win along the way. Focus on growth, not perfection.
Pray and Surrender
My faith has carried me through some of the toughest moments, and if you also believe in God, you know that He is always there to lean on. When life feels overwhelming, prayer can bring comfort, clarity, and strength. You don’t have to carry it all alone.
“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” — 1 Peter 5:7
Seek Professional Support
I am a huge advocate for therapy, yet many in the African community still believe that having God means we don’t need professional help. The stigma around therapy remains strong, but let me tell you this—your feelings are real, and if left unaddressed, they can manifest into deeper issues. Persistent overwhelm can take a toll on your well-being. Seeking a therapist or coach doesn’t mean a lack of faith; it means taking care of the mind God gave you. Professional guidance can offer tailored strategies that friends and faith alone may not fully provide.
Free Therapy Resources
Conclusion
Overwhelm doesn’t have to control your life. By taking intentional steps to manage stress, set boundaries, and focus on self-care, you can regain clarity and peace. Remember that through this journey,...
You are capable.
You are strong.
You are not alone.
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